Lost Whyspers

It's N0 for the SFoL 67 game at FoL . The game was suppose to start already, but had to be reranded since Leafia accidentally posted their rolecard when posting another message. That's okay with me. I randed town both times. And my 2nd rolecard is actually more interesting. 😀 This is a Prestige class, so I think that means more powerful in general. Though with the dead chat, this means my nights won't really be a break away from the game. But I think that's fine for this. I'm kind of excited. 😀 This player list is interesting. Not really any expert players as far as I can tell. A few I don't know yet. And a couple that could be problematic as usual. Haha. 😀 Problematic because they are either hard to read or they sway very easily and might just jump at tunneling town players for little things. We'll see how it goes. I hope there will be at least a few players who can engage in reasonable discussions.

SFoL 67 game had to be reranded Leafia accidentally posted their rolecard Project VS encountering difficulties I expected some issues Still frustrating since this draws time away from other projects Mobile game called Mitrasphere just released Co-op RPG Going to give it a quick try Like the idea of co-op RPG Gives the multiplayer feel without the balance issues of PVP Chatted yesterday with Scruffy about FGO and Alchemy Stars Chatted yesterday with CRichard about Smaug's Lair game on POG 2+2 He's joining too Chatted yesterday with Vulgard about Misc games on FoL Chatted yesterday with Solic He requested 6-month signup ban on FoL  to take a break Told him I'll miss having him around Mutually agreed that we hit it off pretty well despite him backstabbing me twice 😀 Chatted with Scruffy today again Chatted with CRichard today about his posts on the ToL Discord He seems to think everyone hates him He's going to take a break from FM Going through a rough time, but didn'...

I'm switching my profile pic to a new piece from Antilous Chao . I decided to go with blonde this time. 😀 ArtStation - Sister Remi, Antilous chao

The FoL Annual Mash (FAM) game ended at FoL . The wolves won. I'm reading lots of back and forth about the reasons, but basically 2 strong players were allowed to deep wolf. I've been reading through various comments to see what I can learn. I especially like the analysis from players like Vulgard and Solic. I sent a DM to Chloe thanking her for the flavor she did for my rolecard. She replied back with a sweet message that inspires me even more. 😀 Here are the previously unpublished posts I did for the game. I kind of feel like saying more, but not exactly sure where to start right now. I'll see if I get the chance later. Community FM 3 N0 Community FM 3 D1 FAM D2

FoL Annual Mash ended Need to publish previous posts and then maybe say something overall Joined SFoL 67 game on FoL Originally I signed up as backup They just needed one more signup, so I joined Player list seems to lack strong players Some players I don't recognize Going to involve lots of mech to figure out Could be a good opportunity for me SINoALICE undergoing lots of changes for 1st anniversary Some nice additions They are giving away more crystals and pull chances I feel somewhat excited about direction game is taking Gabethebabe posted interest check for Smaug's Lair variation of Fortified Tower I like the theme changes he made Seems like there will be interest on POG 2+2 Funny how he said I tricked him into joining the game on FoL 😀

Discord finally added a profile banner Changed mine to my whisper banner Also set the new About Me text Recently heard about philosophical idea Rawlsian Veil of Ignorance Nice to see my nieces playing chess together I taught them a couple years ago I'm not very good myself I mentioned I could teach them poker sometime Poker more fun because of bluffing and the unknown

Connected with some FoL people on Discord Apprentice, ATNoName, and Simon Not sure Simon actually plays FM, but they are the owner of the LGBT server everyone uses Chatted with ATNoName a bit Recently bought the outfit for Weedy in Arknights since it looked cute Realized afterwards that I actually didn't have Weedy yet 😀 Never tried to roll for her during last banner cause I didn't like her original look much 😀 Hopefully I'll get her sometime in the near future Bought skins for Saria and Firewatch just now

Miach invited me to a Discord server she created Ibeji from War of Genesis is there Signed up as backup for couple FoL games Making good progress on Project SV Apprentice returned Apologized for Fortified Tower 3 game Overwhelmed with IRL issues Foster still hasn't responded to my friend request on Discord Ups and downs with SINoALICE New guild Senate lost GC yesterday Won GC today although it had looked unwinnable Losing some members, including our leader Spinal He needs to move to another time slot due to difficulties attending with this schedule Cerpin taking over leadership Game more fun recently Hopefully guild will move forward okay Even so, I can probably find new guild easily

Bullet journal really was a good idea When uncertain what to write, I can fall back to this I actually have so much I want to write about, but getting stuck on where to begin Bullet lists help with just ignoring formalities with writing and just listing stuff Want to write about stuff related to Forum Mafia Want to write about online friends Want to write about goals Want to write about stuff I've been reading or listening to Oh, Vulgard did send me a message saying that he does read my blog still 😀 Feels nice to have people like him and Scruffy reading Going through old task list started 8 years ago Kind of depressing seeing all the things I wanted to do but didn't Also relieving to see issues that have already resolved themselves Transcribed some thoughts while walking yesterday Need to go through and make corrections then post Pretty much stopped playing GWENT Not abandoning it though Kind of a come and go came I'll probably get the feeling to play again at some point R...

The Fortified Tower 3 game at  FoL  had to be canned. Apprentice hasn't been around to continue hosting the game. Hopefully he's okay. He was kind of already having troubles with getting to the game after long days at work, so hopefully it's just a matter of work and other IRL keeping him away. Still, it is worrisome that he hasn't answered anyone for a while now. Maybe he's been going through a situation like I have in the past where I just can't handle any communication or other new inputs because of extreme overwhelm. Anyway, here are the posts I kept unpublished until the game was done. Fortified Tower 3 Round 8 Fortified Tower 3 Round 9 Fortified Tower 3 Round 11

It's D2 for the FAM (previously Community FM 3) game at FoL . Apparently there was some issue involving Eevee harassing or threatening someone to where he was banned. He had also threatened legal action regarding the name Community FM, so the hosts changed the name. I kind of liked Eevee, but I have seen how he gets rather argumentative. Okay, not sure if I wrote some stuff from D1. I had planned to write something for N1 and didn't get around to it. I had been stuck with anxiety D1 and not returning to post. But then I saw that Misty had tagged me in a message saying that I shouldn't attempt to catch up with the thread. Just when I had time I should come and start posting from there. I really, really appreciated that post from them. It helped me get over my anxiety and get back into the game. Earlier I had attempted to talk with my friend Miach a bit and do some other stuff like listen to music, but I couldn't get over my anxiety. Not sure what it is. I think the game ...

Told Constantyne how chatting with him is complicated Not sure exactly how to explain what I mean by that He replied wondering how it's complicated Not sure how to reply back Still thinking about it Partly to do with our separate lives now Partly to do with our past Partly to do with how we aren't involved in a game together now Partly to do with the topics on world affairs that tend to come up between us Again, not sure what I mean to say 🙂 Haven't played Alchemy Stars again yet Still do want to play Feel like waiting for better time when I can relax and play Maybe too many other things now Chatting with Miach was nice She helped me through a bit Suggested I talk with professional about my anxiety I had considered seeking an online therapist I loathe J! 🤯 Still want to write about the many things I relate to in Oathbringer Wondering if Vulgard still reads my blog once in a while

Friend told me about some awful things happening to his friend Physical abuse at home by grandparents Doesn't think any authorities would believe him over his grandparents I recommended documenting the instances just in case Documentation might be helpful in future God, how can humans do such awful things to each other? Chatting with couple friends today has been helpful to my mood I need to prepare better for the future Need plan for 6-10 years from now

It's D1 for the Community FM 3 game at FoL . I posted a single message so far, but that's it. It was kind of a slower time in the thread and only a few people around. No one really took notice of me. WindwardAway did like my post. She does that often, and it feels nice. Anyway, I did go through posts today and start to note down reads. I've been using the percentages and then giving plus or minus percentages based on various things I see. I've been trying to keep short notes on how much and for what I'm adjusting a percentage. This will be good for me to do in the long run. I'm preparing to post something about what I've done so far, but for some reason I feel nervous about checking the thread again. I just hate how some people jump on others for almost anything. I know I shouldn't let it bother me anymore, but it still does. Maybe I'll never get completely use to it. I'm this way about any type of confrontation in general. I can be tough at time...

It's N0 for the Community FM 3 game at FoL . I randed Memsky, who I eventually figured out was a player from before my time there. This was the special card that Hippo asked to swap for his own rolecard. This looks like it could be a fun role. I'll have to be careful to stay alive until at least D3. I'm going to recruit at least Hippo N1 since it's only fair for him to be in this cult. 🙂 I'm thinking of also recruiting WindwardAway as the 2nd allowed for N1. She's someone who I think would be good to rolecop. UPDATE I'm getting somewhat nervous as the time for the game to start approaches. It's going to start right before my bedtime. I think I won't even bother staying up late for it D1. Going to be a lot of chatting back and forth. And since there are no ITAs for D1, then nothing too exciting should happen. I'm just wondering if anyone is going to mention me not speaking up yet. People seem to forget time zones. People talk about how wolves fin...

It was Round 11 in the Fortified Tower 3 game at  FoL . The previous round Chloe, Solic, and I moved up to Right 6 together and left Gabethebabe behind. We discussed plans on how to continue forward. I suggested that I could move ahead to scout and check for traps so we didn't waste extra rounds waiting on that. Then for this round, I was planning to move up to Right 7. When the action results came back, I was told that both Chloe and Solic stabbed me in the back and I was seriously hurt. Additionally, I was infected with the plague and would die at the end of the next round. In the main thread, PKR was talking about how he'd been hurt throughout much of the game. I commented that I was hurt physically, mentally, and emotionally all in the same round. It's true. I can't believe that Chloe and Solic were actually cops working together and betrayed me. I just didn't see that coming. And then it surprised me that Gabethebabe was actually the Plaguebearer instead of the...

Community FM game on FoL has randed Installed Alchemy Stars to try out Just released today Single player mobile game Art and story style somewhat similar to Arknights Gameplay has interesting RPG puzzle battles My ID on global is 201329058

My niece is reading next Mistborn ( 迷霧之子 ) book! Well of Ascension She even talked with her younger sister about the books Her sister started the Percy Jackson series Gabethebabe complaining about Fortified Tower game Complaining about slowness of game Should be 1 action per day More like 3 actions per week He does have a point Apprentice had this issue previously with the DR game he hosted Seems that he's often busy with work

Feel kind of stuck again Though I've made some progress on thoughts for future Need to keep pushing Reading through games on FoL makes me even more eager to train for FM Especially like what I read from Eevee Might consider studying Eevee more Might ask him questions Keep wondering how much to believe in reads and statements from other players Also think Marshal and Vulgard are good players to study Wondering about SDA Possibly better than I use to think Players from other sites are interesting to read as well Players like Helz and DkKoba Still have professional tasks to handle Still have habits to develop Think maybe I need to give attribution for images used here Not sure how to best do that Should I go back to previous posts? SINoALICE became more fun recently with new guild Senate Nice feeling again of helping to build up guild Not sure how long this will last Still miss old days with SINcerity Haven't been playing GWENT Arknights has become mostly a chore again Need to fi...

Weird situation where I have so much I want to write about Yet don't know what to start with Also feel like I can't get it all down So feel stuck with doing anything I meant to write yesterday Forcing myself just to get these words down Want to write about thoughts from Oathbringer Want to write about thoughts from Fortified Tower Want to write about thoughts on habits Want to write about thoughts on future self

Handling urgent situation Also have other complicated issue Potential huge issues looming in near future GWENT released new expansion New cards available Some look very beautiful Not sure I like having to now deal with new mechanics 🙂 Almost done organizing WLOP artwork Blender 3D model of mermaid included in one package UPDATE: just finished!

Joined new guild Senate in SINoALICE Time slot 2 (01:00 GMT+8) Low to mid level members I visited their Discord server first and felt good there Some unexpected errands today Kept me busy and unable to focus on my regular tasks Constantyne replied just now He said we can try to schedule time to chat He's been away recuperating from life issues

Feel better today Special day with someone special Jane had DM'd me yesterday about finishing up the FBR tool soon They would be doing testing soon I had thought about contacting them recently I need to work on upgrades soon Reading novels does help me a lot Still organizing WLOP artwork from Patreon

Sometimes I just want to say that word. F***. I won't even allow myself to write it. Not sure why. I've just always been reluctant to curse. But I say it to myself. Things are piling up again. Little things, but lots. And a few big things. Or potentially big things? I don't know anymore. I hate all the complications. I hate having to maneuver around everyone's feelings. I hate that things can never just be simple. Will I ever get use to it? Sometimes I just want to forget. I hate dealing with stupidity. Yet knowing that it can happen to anyone, including myself, makes me need to be patient with it. Yet that's annoying. The stupidity itself is annoying, and the needing to not be upset about it is annoying. What am I trying to say? I don't even know anymore. I almost just went to bed because I feel so tired. Physically and mentally. But I had this part of me that couldn't go to bed without writing something. I need to record something here. I feel that urge mo...

Uninstalled Cyber Era Organizing digital art from Patreon NIXEU , Raiko , WLOP , Zarory Need to get back to FM training exercise Constantyne hasn't been saying much Later found that he did send me a message this morning Need to find time when we can actually chat back and forth Haven't heard back from Foster Want to write about Oathbringer Lots of stuff that really hits home for me I've been highlighting lots of text More people quitting SINoALICE, so SINcerity officially disbanded Lots of sad talk about old days Feel like playing Mobile Legends again Miss days with Mistborn Clan

It's Round 9 in the Fortified Tower 3 game at FoL . Solic successfully amputated his arm and Chloe stopped the bleeding with duct tape. Gabethebabe has pretty much been revealed as the Dark One. We entertained the idea that he was claiming Seer, but even he isn't really going along with that. Now it seems like he's basically given up. I did try to offer a compromise for even the situation where he's the Dark One. I was assuming that he marked Solic and then Chloe or me. I was worried he might feel backed into a corner and take his only option of using his ultimate to kill 2 of us. So I suggested we just part ways, him going left and us going up. Then let fate decide what happens to us. He can just hope that the unmarked player is eventually killed along the way. And we just hope that someone or something kills him before he gets a chance to use his ultimate. And he has to promise not to use the ultimate if he's doomed anyway, like if he's infected and will be dy...

Considering whether to offer to join SINcerity for next GC Raffounz clarified that disbanding was just a possibility They are still trying to recruit replacements for me and a few others GC is sooner this time because Pokelabo messed up last month's See that Cyber Era is very similar to Guns of Glory Going to be difficult to keep up power in long run Need to organize my plans for this week Pondering my procrastination with FM training Think I might be feeling inadequate to the task See Vulgard and Marshal and others doing such wonderful jobs with read lists They have so much to say about their reads Very smart and logical I don't know that I can ever reach that point I need to be quicker and smarter I need more confidence I know that practice helps build confidence, but still long way to go Need to procure new laptop soon

It's Round 8 in the Fortified Tower 3 game at FoL . Things started to get more exciting since Round 7 when I encountered Chloe in Right 4 where Marl's body was. We were suspicious of each other at first, naturally, but eventually I suggested a truce. I figured that no matter what wincons we had, it was worth working together at the beginning while there were still quite a few other players. They were very open to this and even openly claimed that they are the Hacker. This worked out very nicely with my role as Thief. We could definitely help each other reach the Tycoon's office together. We have abilities that help with detecting traps and avoiding obstacles. So we went to Right 5 together and found Solic and Gabethebabe there. Apparently Solic had been shot by Marshal, who is the Temponaut. Solic was shot with the aging gun and will die of old age soon. He says he'll be amputating his arm to stop the process from killing him.

Been feeling lonely again Continuing to use Fabulous So far it's slowly building up morning routine habit Started with drinking water in the morning Added eating good breakfast like eggs These are suppose to help with having energy throughout the day Trying out beta for game called Cyber Era Kind of cool style so far Mix of different game types Alice making Thanatology (Death City) game She mentioned using that RPG Maker software Looks pretty cool so far Based on DR and VLR Cool that she's following through with her dream to make a game Found out that digital art gets sold online WLOP put up a few pieces for auction Think I should research cryptocurrencies more Water rationing ended in Taiwan Found out that SINcerity is disbanding Still need to recruit a few members Apparently an officer is leaving Want to give time for people to find another guild before next Grand Colosseum

Oh, an idea just popped into my head while working on chores. I was thinking about how RPGs played as a group could be used for IRL therapy and self-improvement. The group of players and the DM work together to help each other deal with IRL issues through the story. Or to work on self-improvement goals. Any IRL events would be shaped to be part of the storyline. Each player could update the DM on things happening in their life, and the DM can try to incorporate these into the storyline. The RPG could be played in sessions with a certain overarching goal to help a particular person with a major issue. But then any other IRL events could add to the story for other characters. I'm not sure how well this would work out. It would definitely require the right type of people. The DM would need to be trained in some therapy techniques. But I could envision something like this being a great way for people to work together on IRL issues while also having some fun roleplaying. For some people...

Uninstalled SINoALICE Feeling the temptation, so forced myself to remove it When I think about it logically, there's no good reason to keep it Small benefit of being part of guild and needed does not outweigh all the negatives I can find fellowship elsewhere Progressing some in Arknights Finally able to play CC CC so difficult Need to ask Jane about FBR tool Feeling slightly depressed Slightly lonely too Feeling a bit lost Should work on small steps only Not as interested in playing GWENT recently Not sure if I should play Wild Rift Still not happy about the customer support Checked and still can't access shop Thinking about Dragon Raja Still want to make video of my character Probably should uninstall after that Foster removed me as a Discord friend?

I put together a radial for my Motivation Code results from the test I did a while back. Helps for letting me think about the 3 motivations together. I was just thinking about how Influence Behavior and Make an Impact are very similar. Though when grouped by families, Make an Impact is in the Visionary family and the other 2 are in the Team Player family. So I suppose there's synergy in different ways. I do think Influence Behavior and Make an Impact are the 2 key ones for determining what I should work on. Make the Grade is more about who I do things with. I was reading how Make an Impact deals a lot with creativity. That's where impact can be most noticeable. Changing the status quo. So how does this affect my projects? Not sure. I need to dwell on this a bit.

I just noticed that I forgot to publish the draft posts I did for the LG75: Alethi Politics  game at  17th Shard  that finished up a couple months ago. I was an Elim and the Villagers won. I didn't really follow much after I was executed. LG75 D1 LG75 D2 LG75 D3 LG75 N3 I accidentally opened the draft for the last one before publishing it, so it updated the date to today. I set it back to around the correct time.

Held back from playing a few new games Read through Play Store reviews and realized they'd end up as P2W Related them to previous games I'd played that didn't end well like Guns of Glory Need to complete preparations before even mentioning game I'm hosting Sometimes I'm too eager to get signups started Even though I probably have time to do final touchups, better to do them beforehand Helps to not feel so rushed Maybe even prepare more communications ahead of time Keep document of all game communications that will be expected Working on training exercise for 451 Academy Archer trying to tempt me with Phantasy Star Online 2: New Genesis

There's this guy on POG 2+2 called Gabethebabe who uses a profile pic of Emperor Palpatine from Star Wars. He had joined the Fortified Tower game on FoL when I advertised it. The only person to do so from either POG 2+2 or 17th Shard . I had been grateful, though a little concerned since I'd seen him involved in an argument about his usage of an H. P. Lovecraft mod account for his Cthulhu minimash. He had also signed up for the Dixit game I was planning to host on POG 2+2 . I had started the signups before the lockdown in Taiwan got serious and ended up needing to delay the game. I didn't want to start the actual game if I was still uncertain about my schedule and couldn't guarantee time to consistently host it. Apparently Gabe didn't like that I was continuing to post on FoL for the Fortified Tower game and yet didn't start the Dixit game. I'm not sure if he's just not understanding that there's a difference between posting as a player for a gam...

Getting urge to write here more often Not sure if just a way to avoid other things 🙂 Still probably better than other distractions Feeling less likely to play SINoALICE later Signed up for Community FM game on FoL Pretty sure role based on me will involve emoji 🙂 People probably won't take the game too seriously, so should be fine if not much time Thought about using mapping tool to map out life path Found lots of cool mapping tools when working on FBR Might be inspirational to have map to view Continued using Fabulous app Started spreadsheet for distractions Added Age of Magic, SINoALICE, and RPGs

For some reason, I've always had this curiosity about live RPGs. And a few years ago I noticed that lots of games are now available over the Internet using various tools. I've had a desire to play, though I know I'm not so comfortable with the actual roleplaying part. 🙂 I think I just have this image in my mind about playing with a cool group of people and having a blast just making a story together. I did send a message to a DM looking for players on The Mute Mage . It had looked like it might be a casual game that's played post-by-post. But the DM asked about my experience with D&D 5e, which I just know about but that's it. He didn't think it would work out well since he's planning some intensive combat and other lore, so it could be overwhelming for someone new. That's good he let me know upfront. A year or 2 ago I had started watching Critical Role . It's an excellent way to get a feel of the most ideal form of the game. It was enjoyable to ...

I'm switching to a new Aeolian pic for my profile. This is from a new piece that WLOP did recently.

I was experimenting some more with using Ayoa to do radial maps. This time I was doing one for my path forward. I have part of it for the Resistance just to keep those aspects in mind. I'm considering doing more with listing specific things I shouldn't do. I've tried something like that in the past and didn't get much from it. But I've been thinking it might help at this point in my life. I might even need to write out something more to myself about specific reasons why things aren't a good idea. For example, why I should no longer play certain games. Then if I ever get the urge again, I will tell myself that if I at least read through what I wrote previously and still decide on doing it, then that's okay.

Another replacement needed for RWBY game on FoL Considered taking the spot, but looks like someone already took it Still not sure if I really have the time Keep getting tempted to find guild in another time slot in SINoALICE Could be exciting to start with new group However in long-run I still probably shouldn't play Need to force myself to stay away from game for at least 1 week Tried out beta for Final Fantasy VII: The First Soldier Battle royale game set in FF7 world Intro was quite fun Could see this being fun to play Not sure if I want to put much time into the beta Should I wait for live release? Still tempted to play anyway Like how it adds magic and monster fighting to BR

I was trying out a new app called Fabulous . Can't remember where I heard about it. Maybe it was just recommended to me at the Play Store. Anyway, it appears to be a habit training app, but with a nice story feel to it. I get a little skeptical of these types of apps because often they just slap on a layer of story or inspirational theme that's not well done but just enough to be a gimmick to promote the app. However, this one appears like it might be better. I decided to go ahead and give it a try. It does require a subscription eventually. This made me think about my overall quest to create a website or app or methodology or whatever that inspires people to make positive changes. I do think something that shapes a story based around the user to give them inspiration would be helpful for a lot of people. And I've always thought that giving people a background soundtrack as they do things would also help. I wish technology were better to make this easier. Like an easier lin...

I just found out today that my older niece has read the first book of Mistborn already! I had bought the traditional Chinese edition of the trilogy set for her a couple years ago for Christmas because I was sure she'd like the series. Especially since it has a strong heroine for the main character. She had been excited about the storyline when I described it to her. However, when she saw the actual books, she was shocked at how huge they looked and didn't want to read them. I was definitely disappointed, but I know with her personality that there's no use trying to push her to try. I was hoping that someday she'd eventually take a look. Today she was asking me about the e-book I was reading on my phone, which happened to be Oathbringer . I told her that it was a series by the same author ( Brandon Sanderson ) as the books I'd gotten for her before. That's when she told me she'd read the first book. I was quite surprised and delighted. 🙂 It sounded like she...