Lost Whyspers

Feeling good this morning Things should be okay today Still want to get stuff done though Judicious use of rewards and compliments for good behavior Works even in difficult relationships Something heard from Jordan Peterson again in podcast Urgent issue came up Hopefully easy enough to handle

Listening to philosophy podcasts Philosophize This! #126 - Gilles Deleuze pt. 2 - Immanence Existential Stoic Podcast - "The Republic" by Plato Existential Stoic Podcast - Reevaluating Suffering & Stress Jordan B. Peterson Podcast 291 - How to Combat Hedonism | Dr. Peter Kreeft Sunday Stoic 292: Memorize the Stoics with Dr. Kevin Vost Still struggling with balancing hope and despair Considering playing game like RimWorld or Stellaris Seem popular among FoL members Started playing tennis again Oh yeah, it's Halloween today 🙂 Made me recall times in Mobile Legends Miss those times somewhat, yet know I shouldn't return to that Couple more games starting up on FoL Chair of Deception game unfortunately canned since not enough players Not sure if I should join one or both of these new games EDIT: Adding note after listening to Jordan Peterson podcast mentioned above Dr. Kreeft says something about how our free will is all interconnected Good choice you make now will ...

Moving forward Prepared some things for future progress Brainstorming further ideas Time passing so quickly Need to stay focused and not go off on too many tangents at once Watched episode 6 of Rings of Power Enjoying this series I've read people criticize how it departs from Tolkien's actual lore Still enjoying it and not thinking too much about that Need to figure out audiobooks to listen to Even re-listening to some would be good Listening to Making Sense podcast Making Sense #291: Where is Happiness? Buddhism term "metta" translates to "loving kindness" Buddhism term "mudita" translates to "sympathetic joy"

Regretted getting up this morning Wasn't looking forward to a couple tasks for the day However they ended up going more smoothly than expected Yesterday evening had some troublesome happenings Trying to take them in stride though Everything is for a purpose I will look towards my quest Considering offering to backup game on 17th Shard LG 90 game didn't list any pinch-hitters Looks like a large player list with many new people Could see that there might be need for backup Game on FoL filling slowly Started listening again to song Rise Up by Beyonce Beyonce - Rise Up (Epic Movie Clip HD) - YouTube Use to love listening to this 🙂 Inspires me to strive to inspire others, especially children Movie Epic was really good too Constant struggle not simply letting myself slide into despair Sometimes just so tired of fighting But isn't the struggle what makes us feel life? I can understand that conceptually, but still want to give up sometimes I see more and more that habits and ri...

Attention is our life Listening to Time Management for Mortals series by Oliver Burkeman in Waking Up app Need to get use to making more decisions rather than less Distractions like TV or the Internet themselves aren't the cause of the problem They are just the places we go because of a discomfort over confronting other issues Removing one form of distraction will just make us seek out other forms Learn to enjoy engaging in difficult things Kindle a willingness to feel the discomfort Is this like becoming antifragile? Stressful weekend coming up After that, things will go more smoothly again

I can't focus!!! Need to just keep it to small steps! Going to try listening to Stoic podcasts again Sunday Stoic 285: Oikeiosis Sunday Stoic 286: Meditations X.1-3: Align Your Natures Sunday Stoic 287: Part of the Whole. Meditations 10.4-10.6 Sunday Stoic 288: Meditations 10.7: Change is not Evil Sunday Stoic 289: Meditations 10.8 How to find the Fortunate Islands Sunday Stoic 290: Wise Up With Karen Duffy

Things have slowed down some Now don't feel so rushed with urgent things More time to think Kind of uncertain on exactly how to proceed Helping Marluna host their Elements game on FoL No co-host really needed Helping with co-host requirement just in case Going to try to get back into reading again Considering reading Hero on a Mission: The Power of Finding Your Role in Life Want to also finish Sunreach Feel like playing something, but not sure what Started listening to podcasts again Loving my new car 🙂 Love the Android Auto integration

Days going by so quickly Feel so-so Mostly tired Somewhat depressed Thought I wanted to write a lot Can't get my thoughts in order now Want to fight for something Listening to podcasts Reading Guess I stopped playing Mobile Legends Feeling somewhat lonely

Feel like I'm on the cusp of falling into despair again If pause and think, realize this is absurd Not enough to despair about Big part is probably how tired I am Also, just suddenly received unexpected demands Still have lots of other demands on my time Delaying tasks All building up to dangerous levels Up to this point, relatively proud of how I've been handling emotions Successful at stopping myself from dwelling too much on things I can't do much about Making myself move forward with action when doubting myself Feeling in the flow Feeling okay about skipping things temporarily Feeling optimistic about future Meditation has helped Reading has helped Podcasts have helped Music has helped Socializing has helped

Starting to get back to more regular schedule Finished Goldenballs game on FoL Leafia and I won together Nice idea by Wazza Perhaps not exciting, but still fun little game Thinking about putting together survey on Misc games for FoL Glad to see people coming up with different ideas Listening to podcasts more often again Reading Children of the Nameless by Brandon Sanderson Wondering if Gloomhaven would work as PBF Would be very complicated to replicate Could be very fun though Would allow for roleplaying Would allow for players to come and go in different scenarios Feeling glad that I stopped playing SINoALICE Wondering how Scruffy is doing Wondering how Constantyne is doing Birthday coming up soon Don't want to think about growing older 🙂 This is Tiger year, so back to my birth animal

Started post Friday on dealing with difficult people Don't think I'll manage to finish it That day I had to separately deal with 2 difficult people and their blow-ups Situations were still somewhat ongoing People I've had issues with before Unfortunately can't do anything to avoid dealing with them Could feel myself getting depressed and feeling so overwhelmed Like it was end of everything good again Stopped myself from going too far down Realized I could work through it Just needed to handle things calmly Things worked out fairly well Learned my cousin has cancer She's gone through other difficulties in her life recently already Feel so bad for her Can't help feeling a bit relieved that I'm not going through that Feel grateful for what I have Feel less worried about my own problems Is it good or bad that other people's problems can make us feel better about our own? What if a scapegoat of sorts is necessary for us to put things into perspective? For us ...

Playing less on Board Game Arena Playing in Blood on the Forum game on FoL CRichard plans to host one next His 1st time as main storyteller Playing in Mobile Legends still Reached Epic again recently Hope I can reach Legend by the end of the season Reached No. 31 Lolita for Taiwan Continuing to mostly play Lolita Tempted to play other heroes, but don't want to screw up 🙂 Saw that the Player's Invitational game is starting up on FoL Wish I could have joined Looks like nice player list Not really ready for Forum Mafia yet Had to decline some invitations to games recently My current situation isn't really good for playing Continuing to listen to Stoic podcasts a lot Hope to talk more about them soon

Started reading Elantris by Brandon Sanderson Completed a few little things here and there Feel good about that Trying not to think of all the other things still to do 🙂 Joined a Blood on the Forums game on FoL Previous one in signups didn't get enough players This game filled up fairly quickly Going to just enjoy the craziness and not get worked up about what others do Continuing to listen to Stoic podcasts Continuing with my Duolingo streak for studying Chinese Continuing to meditate in the mornings when I can

May have avoided most damage from my mistake yesterday Times like this make me feel more strongly that someone is watching over me Chloe continuing to make progress on new FoL site Let her know about what I did with FoL archive Probably going to make page explaining things Listening to Stoic podcasts still helpful Currently on something like 42-day streak for studying Chinese in Duolingo

Not sure what to expect from this week Still worried about another incident coming up unexpectedly Still so much to do Need to take it step by step Continuing to watch Sword Art Online: Alicization Another incident did come up just now Luckily was able to resolve it quickly Really was nothing Just a certain person trying to make problems out of nothing Continuing to listen to Existential Stoic Podcast Hosts are kind of dorks and say a lot of cliché things over and over However I find this still useful Discovered that just listening to same stuff from various people is good Sometimes gives different perspective Even gives chance to rethink things I've overlooked Above is another recent piece from WLOP

Listening to The Psychology Podcast Sam Harris || Free Will (Part 1) Sam Harris || Free Will (Part 2)

Getting some professional tasks done Playing less on BGA lately Not playing mobile games lately Still considering Mobile Legends Also considering GWENT Listening to podcasts Bookworm 125: Willpower Doesn’t Work by Benjamin Hardy Existential Stoic Podcast - A Field Guide to a Happy Life - with Massimo Pigliucci Bookworm 126: The Mountain is You by Brianna Wiest Bookworm 127: The Art of the Idea by John Hunt Reading Rhythm of War Slacking on practicing Chinese Still need to reply to a few people Artwork above based on Saber character added to some 2D fighter game called Melty Blood Saw an announcement about it recently Slightly tempted to play Realized I'm not that good at 2D fighter games 🙂 Plus it wasn't mobile

About halfway done with Rhythm of War Excellent series that continually impresses me Reading helps me feel more alive Going to experiment with tracking Forum Mafia info in OneNote Probably use section for each game Also sections for general info on wolf and town tells Maybe section for info on players? I think OneNote allows tagging, which should be useful for cross referencing I've heard searching in OneNote is fairly good Idea based on discussions with Askthepizzaguy Also from reading his article on his SkyNet Listening to podcasts on Stoicism

Feel very good today Don't feel tired I think this is due to engaging with lots of ideas recently Listening to podcasts Brainstorming game ideas Thinking about my future Also making progress on projects Want to clean up more Need to get back to practicing Chinese Frustrated with certain person who always wants to tell people how to live

Things went pretty well yesterday Feels good listening to podcasts Gives me ideas to ponder Let's me make connections to previous ideas Current Bookworm podcast mentioned "Curse of Knowledge" Bookworm 124: Liminal Thinking by Dave Gray Curse of Knowledge refers to how your existing knowledge affects your current thinking Sometimes you need to go back to the point of view of a beginner Thought crossed my mind about how someone might put themselves in a simulation with no memory of their real life They could then experience and learn from a new perspective Could I have done that? I think I would Thinking a lot about whether to continue with SINoALICE Basically staying for the Senate guild, but is that enough? Do I really want to continue down this path? Thought crossed my mind that keeping this as a placeholder stops me from filling the spot with something else, like another game So maybe that's a good thing for now? I'm going to keep it there until I have a clearer...